Domestic abuse Advice.

Speaking from personal experience domestic abuse is something that creates a fear that you never thought existed, it's different from other fears, if you think about it this is obvious, when do we ever fear something that we love? Normal fear is when we are afraid of danger but it does not normally fall into the same category as love you wouldn't even think those two emotions could go together, and this is why abuse victims fears are so much different, if it's a husband or wife for instance then you feel love for them but one look can instil a fear you never thought you could feel, that love and fear is what keeps victims from leaving as they don't want to hurt their abuser, it sounds absurd right? But they form an attachment and fear the unknown, victims are so worn down by their abusers that they fear what else could be out there, they don't believe there is a better life. But there is, finding your inner strength is really hard if you've been worn down for so long, but I'll use this analogy think about in movies when the hero gets beaten down by the villain and you think he's never going to get up, but then you see movement, and he slowly but surely gets up and becomes the hero again that he's meant to be and he beats the villain, so what I'm saying is NOT to physically fight as violence is never the answer, mentally fight, build up your mental strength as much as you can, tell a friend or anyone that you can trust even a helpline again like the bullying telling someone can really help and share the burden that you've been baring for so long, it's not your burden to bare, contact the local authorities if you have to, always keep yourself safe if you can, get that strength up, learn to realise that life is better out there and you can make it on your own, you can do this, it's hard but not impossible, always remember that your worth something, you matter, and you deserve happiness, love and kindness, look after yourselves and stay safe, and if you need to talk my Twitter is on this site, take care x Alexandra Denman, psychotherapy practitioner.